Maybe it’s me. Maybe I’m a jinx.
Yesterday, I was scared. That's the only way for me to say it. It's the only way i can say it all without sounding stupid. When I saw that bumper heading towards me, I thought, “oh shit, I’m going to die…” It was as if time slowed down, and I had time to think a few things before the impact. Am I going to die? Is my little brother, friend, and cousin going to be alright? What can I do? Will I ever see my parents again? I’ve never been so scared in my life.
Maybe its my fault? Maybe I’m just a car jinx. It all happened yesterday, around 2pm. Snow was falling lightly onto the ground as I was driving home at 45mph. I was taking precaution, although it was no use… As I was driving on route 46 east, a car in a merging lane, I guess he did not see the yield sign, drove right into my car. He hit my car from the passenger side, and my car slammed into the left lane barrier, luckly there was no car there… After I hit the highway side, my car spun out of control and did a 360 back into the right lane, and smacked the side of the highway and made a complete stop. I was in shock…I looked to see if my little brother was alrgiht, and the other passengers were alright aswell. I sat there, thinking over what just happened. When suddenly, another car speeded and slammed right into my car, tires squealing on the pavement because of the sudden crash. An impact so hard, I barley noticed what happened. He came out of no where, and hit me car so hard I made another 180 and he did a 360 and landed infront of my car, damaging the front bumper and lights. My car?...semi totaled. Still drivable tho. Not that I want to.
I sat in my car, in more disbelief then ever. Tears start flowing uncontrollably out of my eyes, I started shaking in fear of the outcome of this tragic event. I start to panic, and cry out loud. My friend, Steven tried comforting me. My little brother was in complete shock, utter disbelief…and scared. A few cars go by, I managed to get out of the car, and a man asks me if I’m hurt…I say no, just in shock. Standing there, just starring at the wreck in front of me, and asking myself how the hell I survived. My hands and legs trembling from fear and the cold, the man looks at me, and asks again, are you okay? I stare blankly, yeah, I lie as tears roll down my cheeks. Steven hugs me, itll be okay he says trying to comfort me. I rest my head on him and cry. Awful thought run through my head. The cops show up, are you okay? The questions asked one too many times. Over and over, I lie, yeah just shaken up…my stupid reply. Still looking at what was left of my car, trying to figure out why I am even alive, my brother looks at me, his face covered with concern. He hugs me and holds me making me feel slightly calm. The ambulance shows up. They ask too many questions, all ones I cant answer. They tell me I have to get checked up at the hospital. I refuse, stupid move. I get driven home, as my car gets towed back to my house. My parents come home and take my to the hospital. More questions follow. In the end, I am alright, just some aches and pains.
Now I sit at home, all of the what ifs running through my mind. What if I died, What if he died, What is we all died. Trying to figure out why it all happened, noting is piecing together in my head. I cant sleep without nightmares and wishing it was all just a nightmare. No everyone, I’m not okay. My mental state may never be the same again. Please stop worrying about me, and maybe I shall be somewhat better someday…